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Icropped-icon_004n the previous section, we discussed prioritizing needs and not compromising yourself entirely for the sake of resolution.  You may notice that this goes hand-in-hand with our earlier section on assertive communication.

We have also touched down on the basics of self-talk, or the mind’s propensity to narrate its experience.  Negative self-talk often feeds directly into a downward spiral of anger and resentment.  Positive self-talk and assertive communication improves your relationship with yourself and with others.

Anger management is all about effective communication, respecting yourself, respecting others, and owning your behaviors.  A big part of managing your anger is having a healthy self-esteem.

Tips for Establishing Healthy Self-esteem

  • Compassion for yourself and others.  Allow yourself mistakes and setbacks.  You’re only human!  Try to see setbacks and mistakes as lessons, offering important information for us to learn and grow.
  • Value yourself and others.  Value your opinions and the opinions of others.  Know and accept there will be disagreements along the way. 
  • Allow yourself time to resolve conflicts. 
  • Give yourself time to say some positive affirmations or things you are grateful for about yourself each day.  These can include things like, I am patient, I am deserving, I am accepting of who I am.  Making these affirmations in the present tense and not in the future, will help give yourself empowerment.
  • Take time to learn from your mistakes.  Analyze past events and ask yourself how you can improve.
  • Connect to your entire self.  Accept your criticizing thoughts and all of your feelings, even emotions you think are negative or “bad.”  Know they are just thoughts and feelings.  Know that they are likely temporary and can most certainly be transferred into positive action.
  • Cultivate friendships and a support system.
  • Focus on healthy and positive thoughts.  Think loved, grateful, peaceful, patient, happy and caring thoughts.
  • Do things you enjoy and that make you feel good.
  • Take care of your physical body and health.

Exercise 

Continue tracking your conflicts and feelings of anger.  Run down the above list, practice each of these at least once.  Which ones work for you?  Write down your experience. 

Set aside twenty minutes for yourself.  Treat yourself with things like a good cup of coffee or extensive self-love.  Do something you are really good at or enjoy, like drawing or reading.  Write down the positive feelings that arise from this.

In the previous section, we discussed prioritizing needs and not compromising yourself entirely for the sake of resolution.  You may notice that this goes hand-in-hand with our earlier section on assertive communication. 

We have also touched down on the basics of self-talk, or the mind’s propensity to narrate its experience.  Negative self-talk often feeds directly into a downward spiral of anger and resentment.  Positive self-talk and assertive communication improves your relationship with yourself and with others. 

Anger management is all about effective communication, respecting yourself, respecting others, and owning your behaviors.  A big part of managing your anger is having a healthy self-esteem.

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